Individuation & Inner Universe

“The one thing that you have that nobody else has is You: Your voice, Your mind, Your story, Your vision. So, write and draw and build and play and dance and live as only you can.”

- Neil Gaiman.

We’ve been taught to not be 100% ourselves.

We’ve been taught to not be 100% real.

Yet, isn’t “being real” something that we expect from one another?

Most of our behaviours are learned in the very first years of our childhood.

From childhood, we need to be encouraged to learn to be our authentic selves and to become our own person. Being true to our inner understanding, and being in sync with our inner world gives us peace and allows us to live in harmony with the outside world. The inner world is a space for every child to grow, develop, and learn.

How does nourishing the inner world help a child?

Nourishing the inner world of a child creates a sense of Self and what emerges is an Inner sense, a compass to guide you for life.

This is individualisation!

Individuated people are more likely to be authentic and wise. The achievement of this could be something to aim for throughout our whole lives and can, in itself, give us a wonderful sense of purpose.

Our aim should be to help children embark on this journey, which itself is a great feat in this present world of technology and false community of the virtual world.

Being our real selves involves courage, the courage to risk being true and authentic. This sometimes requires that we speak out for change.

If we have been raised to please others at all times, we will likely become adults who do not know our own selves, always trying to satisfy others’ needs at the expense of our own. Due to the impact that emotionally immature families’ and parents’ actions have on children, it leads to these individuals as children and adults who struggle to develop good and consistent self-care. This is because on an emotional level these individuals have been trained to believe their goodness, their worth, and their love ability comes from their ability to sense the needs of other people and put them first.  Sensing others’ worth is good, but not at the expense of one’s own.

The concept of individuation refers to the development of a mature and integrated personality, having a distinct sense of self and feeling unique, independent and separate from others.

Unless we can become a more whole and individuated person, it will be difficult to have relationships with others. If we do not have a distinct and authentic self, we may become over dependent on others, merging with them and taking on their views and ways of thinking.

Forget your voice, sing!

Forget your feet, dance!

Forget your life, live!

Forget yourself and be...

We need to be aware of our Inner Universe, and to nourish our minds, hearts and souls- Our InnerVerse.